Friday, October 16, 2009

Part Of The Solution

Earlier this week I started what was supposed to be a series of posts documenting the issues of the Redskins front office. I realize now that I was starting to become part of the problem, not the solution. Oh, believe me, I’ve got major issues with Dan and Vinny…and the next post I had planned was to focus on bad draft picks, free agent moves, etc. I mean I’m still pissed we are going to go into this game against KC with an offensive line that features a bunch of non-drafted guys and a guy who was out of football for three years. Everyone knew the O-line was an issue, it lacked depth and was getting old…but the front office ignored this. But, I’m not a journalist and it’s not my job to break down information that most of you Skins fans already know. What I am is a huge Redskin fan who happens to blog about them. It’s time to be a fan.

As fans, we can’t change the state of the Redskins. Wearing black to the game and not buying hotdogs is not going to change the product on the field. You paid your hard earned money for those tickets and I agree that your voice should be heard. But, when you attend a game at FedEx, you are going to that game because you want to see your team win! You want to sing “httr,” after they score. The players play hard, they may not have been put in the best position to win…but they want to win. CHEER them, don’t boo them. A win against KC followed by a win against the Eagles and the Skins are back in this thing. Is that what you want as fan? Or do you want to continue to bitch, moan and overall be miserable?

The Redskins season and the Redskins franchise are not dead…so don’t wear black to the game Sunday. I suggest something more attractive, like burgundy and gold. Treat yourself to $10 beer and cheer for the Skins. Be a part of the solution, not a part of the problem.

Cheers and Hail

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Dumb And Dumber

The hiring of Jim Zorn

Dan and Vinny were like a “monkey f’ing a football” during the entire process of hiring a head coach after Gibbs left. What should have been a swift and efficient process turned into a month long soap opera that ended in a…WTF? Here’s a look back at the decisions that brought Jim Zorn to the Redskins.

Ignoring Gibbs

After Gibbs decided to retire after the season, it was said that he (as well as many players) endorsed Gregg Williams for the head coaching position in a meeting with Dan. Of course Dan let that endorsement from the most influential figure in Redskins history go in 1 ear and out the other. But why would Dan listen to the old man? Well, one good reason would be that Dan was still paying Gibbs his 6 million a year as a “consultant.” Another great reason was the fact that Gibbs just led the Skins to the playoffs 2 out of the last 3 seasons…and knew the team better than anyone. Or maybe because Gibbs won 3 Super Bowls and has forgotten more about football than Dan will ever know. Of course Dan strung Williams along for 10 days or so before not only not hiring him, but giving him his walking papers as the D coordinator as well (although Williams would have never stayed, Dan still has to maintain the power.) Dan was wrong not to hire Gregg Williams as the head coach. Not because he was the right man for the job (I’m not sure that he was and not sure he would have been successful either,) but by not listening to a great football mind like Gibbs…something Dan refuses to do. FAIL #1

Promoting Vinny

The next step to finding a head coach was to take a moment and…promote Vinny to Executive VP/Football Operations. The Redskin’s official press release announced that Vinny “will assume responsibility for all aspects of the team's football organization - including personnel, the team roster, scouting and salary cap management.” This is a great way to lure the “cream of the crop” of head coaches…let them know they’ve got to report to Vinny and defer to him on all personnel decisions. Now that’s got to sound attractive to a Cowher-type doesn’t it. FAIL#2

Meet your staff Coach

Next came the revealing of the “mystery candidate,” Jim Fassell. This would end up being the 2nd time that Dan left Fassell at the altar. Dan and Vinny strung him along while they were supposedly trying to assemble his coaching staff, which would feature Rex Ryan as D coordinator and Jim Zorn as the O coordinator. Ryan never had an interest in joining the Redskins in this capacity, but Zorn was hired as the O coordinator, based upon the fact that Dan and Vinny were “blown away” by his interview. Dan and Vinny then inked up Greg Blache as the D coordinator and now basically have an entire staff for their still unknown head coach. Just a quick recap, the incoming head coach now basically has his entire coaching staff already decided, and must defer all football decisions to Vinny. FAIL#3

Suit it up, Jim

Zorn was not a “hot commodity” for O coordinator positions around the NFL; he had never advanced past QB coach at any level in the NFL. He wasn’t the “young, sexy pick” to be a head coach in the NFL…that would have been Josh McDaniels, whom I believe the Skins never interviewed. Zorn was 54 years old and basically was only know for his “quirky” training methods. He had never called plays; he had never devised a game plan. He was never in charge of more than 3 players. But Dan and Vinny were blown away. And as the candidates began to dwindle…the job was now the equivalent of going out on a first date with a girl who’s 6 months pregnant…Dan and Vinny invited Zorn to interview for the head job. “Suit it up, Jim.” FAIL#4

The rest is now history. Zorn was named HC, OC and QB coach. Severely over his head…and he hasn’t been able to get his head back above water. I’m afraid that he’s close to no longer being able to tread water…and that’s where the Skins are at this point.

Next post will focus on personnel decisions.

Cheers and Hail

Giving The Redskins Some Tough Love

The sites been quiet the past several days, quite honestly I’ve been pretty numb about the Redskins. For the first time in forever, I don’t have a positive spin to put on the situation. I’ve been an eternal optimist in regards to the Skins, but I no longer see a light at the end of the tunnel. After some hard thinking and long analysis (otherwise known as drinking heavily) I have come to one conclusion…it’s the front office’s fault. I hate to write negatively about the Redskins, but sometimes you have to sit down and have a talk to those that you love, give them a little "tough love."

A couple weeks ago on ESPN Countdown, Tom Jackson said it best (I’m quoting from memory, may not be word for word) “Dan Snyder wants to win, he just doesn’t know how to win.” “He’s like a guy who’s got a leaky roof…but he ignores it and keeps on fixing up his basement.”

Of course everybody has an opinion on whose fault it is (i.e. Riggo YouTube,) it’s Zorn, It’s Campbell, it’s Snyder or it’s Cerrato. It’s clear to me that it’s the front office. The decisions being made out of Ashburn are clearly made by the tandem of Dan & Vinny…and quite frankly, it’s not working. These 2 peas in a pod can continue family movie night and their racquetball dates, but Vinny has to go for this organization to succeed. And when Vinny does go, Snyder must give full control to a great football mind and let them re-build this once proud franchise. A franchise that now gets booed at home at home regularly, and whose 2 wins have come against teams that lost last week by nearly 50 points.

This is the environment that Dan and Vinny have built. A team that struggles against the worst teams in the NFL, which means the Redskins, must be one of the worst teams? A team that cant’s score 20 points a game and hasn’t beaten a team by double digits since Gibbs left town nearly 2 years ago. As fans, we know the players on the field are playing hard and to the best of their abilities…unfortunately the front office is not putting those players in a position to succeed.

My next post will focus on the decisions that Dan & Vinny have made that have gotten the Redskins to where they are today.

Cheers and Hail

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

10/11-13 Happy Bday Nolan Reimold & Gregg Olson

Happy birthday Nolan Reimold. Nolan just finished his rookie season for the Orioles. It was an impressive campaign that saw him win AL Rookie of the Month honors in June and garner some media attention for AL ROY. Alas, his season was cut short by an achilles injury. Overall Nolan batted .279 with 15 HR’s and 45 RBI’s. He also showed some surprising speed on his way to stealing 8 out of 10 bases. Nolan also spurred Fatpickle to create these T-shirts that are soon to be classic collector’s items. I look forward to watching Nolan excel for the Orioles in the years to come. Happy 26th Mr. Reimold.

Happy birthday Gregg Olson. Gregg played 6 seasons for the Orioles from 88-93’. He won the 89’ ROY award (beating out Ken Griffey Jr.,) when he went 5-2 with a 1.69 ERA and saved 27 games for the “Why Not” Orioles. Blessed with a devastating, knee-buckling curveball, Gregg saved 160 games and had a 2.26 ERA during his Oriole tenure. His 160 saves are #1 all-time in Orioles history. Gregg was inducted into the Orioles HOF in 2008. Happy 43rd Mr. Olson.

Happy birthday Skip Hicks. Skip played 3 seasons for the Redskins from 98-00’. His best season was 98’ when he started 5 games and rushed for 433 yards and 8 TD’s. Skip was drafted in the 3rd round out of UCLA where he still holds the record for TD’s in a season (26) and a career (56.) Happy 35th Mr. Hicks.

Cheers and Hail

Thursday, October 8, 2009

Fatpickled: Ten Post From Year 1

Here's the final celebration of Fatpickled turning 1 last week...a list of 10 posts I think you should read. I can't really call them a best of, or a top 10 list, because they would need to be award winning pieces or something for that. Nope, not winning any awards here at Fatpickled, just trying to entertain some of the people, some of the time. If you've been with me since the beginning, here's a chance to relieve some old memories. If your new to the site, here's a chance to catch up on some older posts. Whatever category you fit in, thanks for following Fatpickled.

Guys Night Out

This was a post about all the athletes I want to hang out with and have a beer. It was the most visited post I’ve ever done.

The Caddyshack Remake…Starring???

Over 3500 unique votes were cast to decide who should star in the Caddyshack remake.

Just Another Sunday Night

The his and hers diary of a Redskins fan coping with a loss.

Hot Chicks

Coverage of the Sweet 16 Hot Chicks tournament won by Julianne Hough.

I Don’t Like The Yankees So Much

Probably the true winner of the most visited post ever, but we’ll never know as all the Yankees fans crashed the site for 8 days.

Dallas Week

Guest bloggers and I discussed why we love the Redskins/Cowboys.

Billy Bob Thornton Game

I match up athletes with their celebrity look alikes.

Athlete Interviews

Exactly what it says, interviews I’ve done over the past year with various athletes.

Sail Away With Me

Before the blog became sports only, I sometimes wrote about family stuff. This is a long, but funny read.

The Last Word In Big D

The first post ever, without this one there would be no others.

Cheers and Hail

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

NFL: Week 4 In Review

Fatpickle's NFL Week in review posts are 1 sentence thoughts on each NFL team. Sometimes a guest joins me, this week I'm solo, last week I skipped it all together. I suck.


NYG A couple weeks ago I said they may not make the playoffs; wrong…they win at least 11 games, F me to tears.

PHI Mcribb better get healthy fast…or risk losing his job, especially since he’s the 3rd best QB on the roster.

DAL The Cowboys should never ever throw the football when all their RB’s are healthy, period.

WAS Zorn’s been around the West Coast offense for nearly 20 years, same amount of time I’ve been with my wife. I don’t need an “extra set of eyes,” to know what offensive plays to run on her.


MIN My hatred of this team is growing like the ugly beard on Brad Childress’s face.

GB This team would be so much better if they could just protect Rodgers.

CHI Jay Cutler and Nuke Laloosh may be the same person.

DET Stafford can have a great career throwing the high ball to those Johnsons.


NO At least Reggie Bush can score with Kim Kardashian.

ATL This team just seems blah this year.

TB Why not look to the future with your #1 pick (Freeman?)

CAR There’s a Cajun word down on the bayou that describes Delhomme…sucks.


SF Is Vernon Davis blossoming?

SEA This team goes nowhere without a healthy Hasselback, I mean beck.

ARI I wonder if Boldin’s brother tweets. I’d like to hear what Boldin thinks about his looks.

STL The greatest turd on turf.


NYJ Good defense, hardnosed coach, good running game…that’s how you win in the NFL.

NE Stealing other teams information…that’s how you win Super Bowls in the NFL.

BUF I think T.O. is keeping himself together pretty well, considering…

MIA The feel good story of last season seems long ago and far away.


BAL Still the team to beat in the AFC.

CIN Playoffs…uh no!

PIT Wow…does Polamalu make a difference on that D!

CLE Mangini’s autobiography should be titled “How To Not Win Games While Alienating Your Players.”


IND It’s a given that they start each year by winning 8 or 10 in a row.

JAC Wow, they could end up being 6-2…then finish 7-9.

HOU I don’t think this team will ever be able to take the next step.

TEN After 4 weeks of picking them to win, they now could start 0-8. Ramsey or Young?


DEN Ugliest 4-0 team ever? Can the Royal Baller get some touches?

SD Norv and Zorn have the same postgame speech. “We’re getting better; we just need to make a couple plays.” Uh, Norv…the Chargers were 14-2 before you got there.

OAK The QB is completing 39% of his passes and the Coach might be going to jail. Al Davis is unaware about any of this.

KC Look at it this way KC, you’re not as bad as the Rams.

Cheers and Hail

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

10/5 Happy Bday Rex Chapman & Chris Whitney

(photo courtesy of D.C. Sports Bog)

Happy birthday Rex Chapman. Rex played 3 seasons with the Bullets from 92-94’. Rex is one of my favorite basketball players of all-time. He could take you to the hole and dunk on you, or hit fall away 3’s from 30 feet. I especially liked his jump shots that seem to arch all the way up to the rafters before swishing thru the net. Rex won many a game with last second 3’s (search on YouTube,) including the season opener in 94’ against Shaquille O’Neal and the Orlando Magic. Rex’s amazing hops also earned him a spot in the NBA’s dunk contest where he dunked 2 balls (one with each hand.) During his tenure Rex averaged 15.6 points per game. Rex retired after 12seasons in the NBA and now serves as VP of player personnel for the Denver Nuggets. Happy 42nd Mr. Chapman.

Happy birthday Chris Whitney. Chris played 8 seasons for the Bullets/Wizards from 95-04’. Chris appeared in all 82 games 4 times during that span. Chris ranks 1st all time in FT % for Washington at .879, and 3rd all time in 3 pointers with 489. His best season came in the 01-02 when he averaged 10.2 points and 3.8 assists. In retirement Chris started a company with former teammate Jahidi White. Happy 38th Mr. Whitney.

Cheers and Hail

Monday, October 5, 2009

The All-Time Greatest Fantasy Football Team

You ever wonder what would be the greatest fantasy football team ever? Well wonder no more, here it is in all it's glory. This isn't a list of the greatest fantasy players of all-time, but a list of the greatest fantasy seasons from each position. Basic fantasy scoring was used to compile this list and no players were bumped up or omitted based upon my personal preferences...this is the real deal. I love the fact that players from the 50's,70's and 80's made the squad...with Ditka narrowly missing from the 60's. Here's the greatest fantasy football team ever:


Tom Brady 07’
Before Giselle, Brady was a stud…4,800 yards and 50 TD’s passing plus another 2 more rushing as an added bonus.

Daunte Culpepper 04’
There was a time when Daunte was the greatest QB in fantasy…that time was the year before I drafted him in the first round, otherwise known as the year before he blew out his knee and was never the same. 4,717 yards passing to go along with 406 rushing and 41TD’s in 04’.

(honorable mention (H.M) Marino 84’, Young 98’, Manning 04’)


Marshall Faulk 00’
For 4-5 years straight every draft started with this guy’s name being called…in 2000 he peaked with 2,189 yards rushing/receiving and 26TD’s (in 14 games.)

Priest Holmes 03’
After Marshall stopped going # one, this guy replaced him and in 03’ he went off for 2,110 yards and 27TD’s.

Emmitt Smith 95’
Emmitt turned his nearly 30 touches a game into 2,148 yards and 25TD’s in 95’.

Shaun Alexander 05’
Alexander set the record for rushing TD’s in 05’ with 27 and added 1,880 yards on the ground.

OJ Simpson 75’
In 73’ OJ rushed for 2000 yards, in 75’ he was better…2,243 total yards and 23TD’s in only 14 games!

(H.M. Craig 85’ T. Davis 98’, A. Green 03’)


Randy Moss 07’
98 catches for 1,493 yards and a NFL record 23 receiving TD’s.

Jerry Rice 95’
Not the 87’ season w/ 23 TD’s in 95’ he had 122 receptions for 1,848 yards and 16TD’s.

Isaac Bruce 95’
Before the greatest show on turf Bruce was the man 119 rec’s 1,798 yds & 13TD’s.

Herman Moore 95’
95’ featured 3 of the best fantasy seasons ever by a WR, Moore went for 123-1,686-14.

Elroy Hirsch 51’
I love that someone makes this team that played in the 50’s…you can’t deny “Crazy Legs” stats, 17TD’s and 1,498 yards in a 12 game season!

(H.M. Clayton 84’, Carter 95’, Owens 01’)

Tight End

Antonio Gates 05’
The best season ever for a TE, 89-1,101-10.

Kellen Winslow 80’
He led the NFL with 89 catches, had 9TD’s and set a record for yards by a TE with 1,290.

(H.M. Ditka 61’ Gonzalez 00’)


Jeff Wilkins 03'
Kicking for the greatest show on turf he nailed 39FG’s and 46XP’s plus 4FG’s of 50+.

Gary Anderson 98’
His 35FG’s, 59XP’s and 2FG’s of 50+ were nice….but his 34 points in weeks 15&16 helped a lot of folks win their leagues.

(H.M. Mosely 84’ Vanderjadt 03’)

Defense/Special Teams

Bears 85’
11 games under 10 pts allowed w/ 2 shutouts, 54 TO’s, 65 sacks and 7TD’s!

Raven’s 00’
11 games under 10 pts allowed w/ 4 shutouts, 49 TO’s, 35 sacks and 3TD’s.

(H.M. 91’ Redskins, 91’ Eagles)

Cheers and Hail

I Was Awesome!

This is a commercial from a local grocery store here in Florida; I think it captures the essence of what makes youth sports great. As a father of a soon to be 5-year-old who hasn’t shown a lot of athletic ability to this point, I can relate to the father portrayed in the commercial. It’s called “First Game,” hope you enjoy it.

Cheers and Hail

Sunday, October 4, 2009

10/4 Happy Bday Sam Huff

Happy birthday Sam Huff. Sam played 5 seasons for the Redskins from 1964-69’. He is one of the greatest linebackers in the history of the NFL and a member of the HOF. Sam is a true southern gentleman from a small coal-mining town in West Virginia, but on the football field he’d knock the snot out of you. Here are a few details about Sam’s career:

Tom Landry (the Giant’s D-coordinator in 1956) changed the Giants defense to a new innovative scheme called the 4-3, in order to play to Sam’s strengths. This defense is still used by most teams today.

In 1959 Sam became the first NFL player to appear on the cover of Time magazine.

The late Walter Cronkite aired a CBS news special entitled “The Violent World of Sam Huff.” Sam was wired for sound in games long before NFL films came along.

Vince Lombardi talked Sam out of retirement in order to return to the Skins in 69’ as a player-coach.

What I’m trying to say is if the biggest magazine in the U.S., the greatest newscaster ever and the greatest coach in the history of football all want a piece of you…you were one bas ass football player.

Sam is well known too today’s Redskins fans for his broadcasting role on Redskin’s radio…a post he has held since 1973. He’s entertained Skins fans for over 45 years and will be remembered forever…and he’s still entertaining us today! Happy 75th Mr. Huff.

Happy birthday Brian Kozlowski. Brian appeared in 32 games for the Redskins over 4 seasons from 2004-2007. Mostly a blocking H-back and TE in Gibbs offense he also served as a mentor to a young rookie named Chris Cooley. Brian is partly responsible for the “Captain Chaos” nickname given to Chris…he bet him $100 he wouldn’t introduce himself to the Rams as “Captain Chaos’ before a game in 2005, this was after a bacon eating contest. Despite being undrafted, Brian went on to play 14 seasons in the NFL. Happy 39th Mr. Kozlowski.

Happy birthday Mark Mclemore. Mark played 3 seasons for the Orioles from 1992-94. He revived what was a stalling career in Baltimore by becoming an everyday player who could play multiple positions. During his tenure for the Orioles Mark played 6 different positions. His best season came in 93’ when he drove in 72 and had 21 stolen bases. Overall Mark played 19 seasons in the bigs, he retired after the 2004 season…as the oldest player in the majors that season. Happy 45th Mr. Mclemore.

Cheers and Hail

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Oct 1-2 Happy Bday Mark Rypien & Alvin Garrett

Happy birthday Mark Rypien. Mark played 8 seasons with the Redskins from 1986-1993. After sitting out the 86-87 seasons on the injured list, Mark finally got his chance to play in 88’ and played well…throwing 18 TD’s in 9 games (only 6 starts.) Mark had a Pro Bowl season in 89’ when he threw for 3,768 yards and 22 TD’s as well, but things really came together for Mark and the Redskins during the 91’ season. The 91’ Skins were one of the greatest teams in the history of the NFL and Mark was the MVP of the team. He passed for 28 TD’s and 3,564 yards on the way to his Super Bowl MVP performance. Mark’s 91’ stats would have been even more impressive had the Redskins not won 12 games by more than 13 points. Mark ranks among the top 5 all time in most of the Redskins passing records. Mark also had an impressive 45-27 record as a starter in DC.

Mark went thru something I could never imagine as a parent of a young child, he lost his son Andrew to cancer at the age of three. Since retiring from the NFL in 2001 (when Mark spent the season backing up Peyton Manning)
Mark has devoted his life to the Rypien foundation. His foundation is devoted to help families who have children fighting cancer. I recall watching a game later in Mark’s career when he played for the Rams. He happened to be playing the Redskins that day, and he played the game with a shaved head…as a sign of support for his son Andrew. Mark played well, throwing for 347 yards in a losing cause. I remember feeling inspired by him that day…even more so than that wonderful 91’ season.

My 4-year-old son was sick with a flu like virus last week and it broke my heart as he vomited and felt terrible for 48 hours. He’d ask if the ginger ale would make his tummy all better…like immediately better, and I felt helpless to try and help him. He’s all better now, but many children are not. My son has a little friend in his class named Stevie who has attended pre-school with my son for the past 2 years. Stevie went to the hospital a couple weeks ago with pain in his shoulder. The doctors originally thought he had an infection, but the test came back that Stevie has cancer. Stevie is now in the hospital receiving chemo and fighting this horrible disease. We need to find a cure for this disease, please donate your time or hard earned money to get us closer.

As a fan of the Redskins, Mark will always have a place in my heart. I appreciate his effort on the field and will never forget playing catch with him one beautiful day long ago at old Redskin’s Park. Happy 47th Mr. Rypien.

Happy birthday Alvin Garrett. Alvin played 4 season from 1981-84’. Alvin’s stats from that time are not too impressive; he only caught 27 balls for 343 yards and 1 TD in 31 games. But, Alvin had an amazing run in the 82’ playoffs filling in for an injured Art Monk. In 4 playoff games that year Alvin had 15 catches for 242 yards and 5 TD’s plus 3 carries for another 46 yards. Alvin was also well known for
Howard Cosell’s famous call on Monday night football. Happy 53rd Mr. Garrett.

Cheers and Hail