Happy Bday Boog Powell & Brian Mitchell

Happy birthday Boog Powell. Boog played 16 seasons with the Orioles from 1961-1974. While playing for the O’s he accumulated 1,574 hits, 303 HR’s and 1,063 RBI’s. He ranks in the top 7 all-time in nearly every Orioles offensive category. He was a 4 time All-Star, 2 time World Series champion and the 1970 AL MVP. A hulking 6’4” and 240 (plus) lbs, Boog was a big lovable teddy bear. As great a player as Boog was, he may be a better cook. He’s written several cookbooks and you can’t go to Camden Yards without chowing down on some of his world famous BBQ. Boog was also one of the key players in the “less filling, taste great,” commercials from the 80’s. Happy 68th Mr. Powell.



Happy birthday Brian Mitchell. Brian is one of the greatest kick returners in the history of the NFL and one of the 70 greatest Redskins. He played 10 years in DC from 1990-1999. His 23,330 total yards ranks 2nd all time (behind Jerry Rice) in the history of the NFL. Brian holds 13 NFL records including most career punt return yards (4,999), kickoff return yards (14,014), and special teams TD’s (13.) He led the NFL in total yards 4 times…the only other player to do that was Jim Brown. Brian missed only 1 game in his entire 14 year career! The first time Brian touched the ball as a member of the Redskins he took it to the house and in his last game as a Skin (99 Playoffs vs. Tampa) he took it 100 yards to the house again. He was a great player who should get serious consideration for the Hall of Fame. You can now see and hear him on the radio in the DC area…Happy 41st Mr. Mitchell.

Cheers and Hail

Happy Bday Randle EL

Happy birthday Antwaan Randle El. ARE is entering his 4th season with the Redskins, returning punts and playing WR, with a little QB mixed in. During his 3 seasons in DC ARE has accounted for 2,767 all purpose yards and 11TD’s. ARE boasts an amazing 153.1 QB passer rating for his career…158.0 is perfect. His WR option passes have resulted in 20 completions out of 25 attempts with 4 TD’s and 0 INT’s. An incredibly gifted athlete ARE played football, baseball (he was drafted by the Cubs) and basketball (under Bobby Knight) at Indiana University. Playing QB for Indiana ARE accumulated 7,469 passing yards, 3,895 rushing yards and 92 TD’s. He was the first player in the history of Division I college football to both pass and rush for 40 TD’s. Happy 30th Mr. Randle El.

Cheers and Hail

Happy Bday Colt Brennan

Happy birthday Colt Brennan. What birthday present will Colt be unwrapping today? Possibly a pair of double D’s? Colt is entering his 2nd season with the Redskins and has developed a “colt” following of fans clamoring for him to be the starter. Colt holds over 30 Division I passing records and is the most prolific college passer of all time. Colt has also shown acting ability off the field. Already a legend in Hawaii, if Colt becomes the QB in D.C. (and all the fame that it brings) he might just star in a Cannonball Run remake and take over the world. Happy 26th Mr. Brennan.

photo via Matt Terl and The Redskins Blog

Happy birthday Alfred Fincher. Alfred is entering his second season as a backup linebacker and special teams player for the Redskins. Alfred has been sporting a Mohawk in training camp this year, causing a bit of attention. Happy 26th Mr. Fincher.

Cheers and Hail

August 13: Happy Bday Chris Hanburger

Happy birthday Chris Hanburger. Chris was a 9 time Pro Bowler who played 14 seasons and 187 games…all with the Redskins. He was drafted in the 18th round of the NFL draft! How’s that for an overachiever? Unfortunately they didn’t keep track of tackles when he played, did he have 2,000? Is he a Hall of Famer? One thing is for sure…he turned Matthew McConaughey into a Skins fan. A quote from MM from Premiere Magazine:

"The 'Skins had a linebacker named Chris Hanburger, who'd tackle guys and then dance
over them," McConaughey says. "I loved him and [running back] John Riggins.”

I wish I was old enough to have watched this guy play. On top of all the football accolades, he went into the automobile business in retirement, furthering his endearment to my heart. He is now living in Darlington, SC and fully retired. Happy 68th Mr. Hanburger.



Happy birthday Greg Manusky. Greg played 3 seasons with the Redskins from 1988-90.
Greg was a special teams standout who also saw time at middle linebacker. He played with a reckless abandon and beat the shit out of himself after every missed tackle. He wore crazy facial hair and Mohawks. He totaled 161 tackles during his tenure. Greg played a total of 12 seasons and 178 games in the NFL. He joined the coaching staff of Marty Schottenheimer in 2001, coaching linebackers for the Skins. He’s now the defensive coordinator for the 49’ers. Happy 43rd Mr. Manusky.

Happy birthday R.C. Thielemann. RC played 4 seasons with the Redskins from 1985-89. RC played 43 games with the Skins and won a Super Bowl in 87’ as a member of the Hogs. For his career RC played 12 seasons and 157 games in the NFL. RC was a 3-time Pro Bowler. In retirement RC got into the mortgage business and now owns his own mortgage business. Happy 54th Mr. Thielemann.

Happy birthday Chris Dishman. Chris played for the Skins in 1997 and 1998. Chris earned a trip to the Pro Bowl in 97’ after a stellar campaign. He played in all 32 games in his 2 years with DC, totaling 6 int’s and 130 tackles. Overall, Chris played 199 games over 13 seasons in the NFL, grabbing 43 picks. In retirement he got into coaching and now coaches the secondary for the Chargers and his old coach, Norv Turner. Happy 44th Mr. Dishman.

Cheers and Hail

The UFL Draft: Part II

This post originally appeared at http://lunn65.blogspot.com/.

So here is Part II of the UFL Draft. Yesterday, I did defense. Today Fatpickle has done Offense. The Interjections in italics are mine (FWG).

UFL DRAFT: PART II - OFFENSE

1) Travis Henry –
The great thing about Travis, we are guaranteed to have 18 people at the game if his 9 children and 9 different baby mommies show up. Possible contraceptive sponsorship here.
FWG:And if the UFL is successful, in later years his fan base will only expand exponentially. Consider this a sound investment, season ticket sales through the roof. Travis Henry: The gift the keeps on giving.
(There are an astounding amount of former Bills in this draft)

2)Plaxico Burress – I think he’s the perfect fit for the run and shoot offense. I must ask you FWG, why would one carry a loaded weapon in their pants inches from their junk? That’s a different kind of game of Russian roulette.
FWG: I'll tell you when; when one has nothing to lose. Its a metaphor?









3) Donte Stallworth –
I like my wide receivers smart and elusive. If you can kill a man and only serve 30 days in jail, you fit that bill. Just try to contain him.
FWG: See, this is when I wished Stallworth played baseball. Hit-n-Run references....too soon?



4) Jamal Lewis –
So he financed a major drug deal for his buddies he grew up with… big deal? Why is it always the buddies you grew up with that get you in trouble? As far as I know the buddies I grew up with would like me to finance a sleeve of wiffleballs and a package of oatmeal cream pies. Consider it done…I just want my cut.
FWG: You know, we used to call that "being a good friend." Troubled times. Troubled times.





5 Nate Newton –
5 weeks after getting arrested for having 213 lbs of pot in his van, Newton was arrested again. This time he only had the van loaded down with 175lbs! It’s obvious that Nate Newton is no quitter and he’s not going to lie down on me. Well he may lay down if he’s sampling the product, but I like his never give up attitude.
FWG:
A. Sampling the product never hurt anyone, right Ricky Williams?
B. I agree with this pick, Newton is obviously down with the whole "weight loss thing" 213lbs to 175lbs? Expect a leaner/meaner Newton in his UFL Debut.

6) Timmy Smith
– I met Timmy the season after his big super bowl game, I’m not sure if the Redskins knew he was a crack head, but I could tell he was, even as a 14 year old. He was shakier than my friend’s ex-wife on a business trip… she bounced more balls in Vegas than Donovan Mcnabb bounces on the Lincoln Financial turf.
FWG: Did you have a Mean Joe Green moment, where instead of tossing a used jersey on you, he chucked his crack-pipe at you can called you a white devil?

7) Maurice Clarett –
We have to have some guns and ammo on the offensive side of the ball to offset Tank Johnson. Plus, we need to get our goose on! I also heard that Maurice is a pro at the dine-and-dash, which could come in helpful at away games.
FWG: I knew a guy who played with him at State. Clarett used to lift weights with Grey Goose in his water bottle. Getting his "Goose on." If you can workout drunk, you can play in the UFL. I'm gonna trademark that.




8)Ryan Leaf
– I like a drinker and my shoulder has been f*#king killing me…I think Ryan can get me something to make it feel better.
FWG: A ballsy move asking one of your players for pain killers. It is exactly that kind of heart and determination that servers him well on the field. And potential nickname: "The Oxycontin Cowboy" ...food for thought.



9) Doug Ramey - I was going to pick Art Schlichter here, but then I thought...I know a better drunk QB with a gambling problem. Yep, that's none other than Fatpickle in 1987. A couple observations from this picture.

A. I have no socks on because my good friend Eli Berry enjoyed pissing on my socks in the locker room. This went on during football and basketball season, thankfully he didn't play baseball.

B. It was perfectly acceptable to play football in 1987 without socks on...I had the whole Miami Vice thing working.
C. I was making out with a lot more chicks than you were in 1987!
FWG: The Make-a-Wish foundation wants their wish back. Embarrassing.
...and yes, in 1987 I was one year old.

10) Cecil Collins -
This guy was the real deal. Big, strong and fast…if only breaking into a woman’s apartment and masturbating in the closet wasn’t illegal. It would have been a simple B&E if he hadn’t been caught with a loaded gun in his hand!
FWG: Masturbating in a closet? See, some people still do enjoy life's simple pleasures.

11) Michael Irvin -
He's never met a corner that he couldn't push off from...just don't let him in the training room. Michael + scissors = bad news!
FWG: A few years back I was dating a girl who was asked out on a date by Michael Irving. Turns out this "date" was a trip to the ESPYS. She said no. I broke up with her. The end.

Redskins TC: 8/10-8/11 In Review

Colt throws his first pick, will he move up the depth chart? (PFT)

Redskins answer 3 random ?'s. Zeus, Deebo, Tiny...whatever you want to call him he's never been this popular as an actor. (Hogs Haven)

Who's in, who's out Thursday night vs. Baltimore. (Redskins Blog)

CB Justin Tryon is improving with some help from Darrell Green. (Wapo)

Jamie Mottram looks like Mark Brunnell circa 2005...but with a better arm. (The Cooley Zone)

I love Joe Bugel, Joe Bugel loves violence. (D.C. Sports Bog)

Dan Steinberg interviews Joe Theismann...who still enjoys talking. (D.C. Sports Bog)

Another article about our 2nd year, 2nd round WR's. (Yahoo Sports)

DJ Hackett is in the WR mix. (Redskins.com)

The best of Twitter 8/10-11

@rockym52 Omg omg Jadon Campbell is sitting right beside me tearing up a nutty bar ice cream I wonder if I can get the wrapper for a souvnier

@redskinsblog Big successes in LB tip drills: HB Blades, Brian Orakpo, Chris Wilson. Someone asks, "How's HB always get up that high?"

@dcsportsbog Haynesworth has never played at FedEx. "I hear that the fans are supposed to be crazy and loud, like a college stadium but on steroids."

Cheers and Hail

The UFL Draft: Part 1

This post originally appeared at www.thefatwhiteguy.com. Rob Lunn is the FWG and he is a talented writer who's work can be seen all of the world wide web. I encourage you to visit his site and bookmark it while you are there. Rob and I will be gang tackling a few blog posts moving forward.


A few weeks ago, the pillars of secrecy held their annual meeting. No, not Skull and Bones or The Illuminati. Instead an organization shrouded in even deeper mystery: The United Football League. A few weeks ago the UFL held their draft; Like a crazy game of "Who's Line" no one knew the rules, who was drafted, and another similarity--I'm pretty sure next season the points won't matter. So in lieu of me talking about who was actually drafted, I'd like to present to you the 11 draft picks for my UFL Fantasy team:

The interjections in bold are the work of fellow blogger, Fat Pickle. He runs his own blog FATPICKLED which is pretty sweet. It's a Redskins/Orioles/useless pop culture blog.

UFL DRAFT: PART II - OFFENSE

Defense:
1) Ray Lewis
FWG: In the UFL we are all about character issues, so who better than the star linebacker who killed a man. I mean on the field terror is nothing if you can compliment it with off the field insanity. If Fatpickle can draft Michael Vick, than I can take Ray Lewis. Dogfighting has nothing on Murder One.

FP: Ray didn't actually commit said murder, he's got people to do that. So, I will not be approaching Ray or his posse with any negative thoughts about your first round pick.

2) Lawrence Taylor
FWG: He's aged considerably well, you know...despite thew whole cocaine thing. The most dominant player of his era, now says he cares more about watching pornography that watching football. Spotty criminal history? Lack of interest in football? Likes porn? Game. Set. Match. LT is a perfect fit for the UFL.

FP: "Spotty criminal history? Likes Porn" sounds like the scouting report on me. You may need to hire Ron Jeremy to help him break down tape.

3) Bruce Smith.
FWG: I know, I know. You're already thinking I'm insulting Bruce. Quite the contrary. Bruce Smith was my idol, every night I crawled into bed during my formative years, I had Bruce's height-poster pinned on my wall, you know the one you measure to see if you are as tall as the big guy. Yes, I fell asleep every night while a 6'6 black man watched over me. I slept soundly. My point is this, he's the all time greatest---he's going into the HOF---there really isn't much left for him to conquer.....except a marginal football league. Get 'em Bruce!

FP: You seem to be going in a different direction than I am with my draft, 3 hall of famers in the first 3 rounds? I got 3 guys who are serving 5-10. Anyway, speaking of sleeping soundly...do you know where Bruce sleeps soundly? Traffic lights. Traffic lights in Virginia Beach at 2 in the morning. Usually with a cop watching over him. Oh one other thing, how bout them 91' Skins?

4) Spike
Spike? Who the hell is Spike? I'll tell you who--- only the most intimidating 12 year old I've ever known. The meathead star of a little flick known as, The Little Giants--which I think took the Best Picture Oscar in '95. Countless pee-wee-ers modled their game after him. The kid had a crew cut, bulging muscles, and an attitude to match. Looking back, when his dad said, "Every night I rub evaporated milk into his hamstrings." ---I think we all know what he was really doing. PED's. The Cream and the Clear. Balco, Conte. UFL. BOOM!

FP: You know who I should draft from that movie? Polk High starting full back #33...Al Bundy. Now that's a true american bad-ass. He scored 4 TD's in the city title game!

5) Lavar Arrington

Yeah I know Fatpickle probably has a softspot for Arrington (Cheers and Hail, blah blah blah) but guess what? So do I. Despite Arringtons low production in the NFL all indicators point to him being a stand up guy. If being "retired" from football has taught me anything, its that the itch to play comes in waves. Well, I hope such a whim comes to Arrington when the phone rings and I tell him he's been pretend-drafted to my fantasy team.

FP: Wrong, fatboy. No soft spot for Lavar. The only soft spots were in his game. Always a step away from making a big play. And if you want to ring his phone it's easy to do, just call 106.7 the fan. Yep, he's talking about football on the radio. Maybe he'd make a good play by play announcer for you. Now, Dexter Manley...

6) Dimitirus Underwood
A player who is past his prime, faded from the limelight, or enjoying a holiday in the penal system have all been prime picks in my draft. How about a player who has disappeared. Even the Associated Press is comfortable describing his career with mysterious wordplay "....after for years he resurfaced..." Where exactly was he? Who knows. But come this fall he may very well be in one of 7 unknown cities, co-oping players and profits, and holding games in sponsor clad stadiums and rundown warehouses. In other words, he'll be in the UFL. I hope.

FP: This is what we call a "sleeper" pick. This guy had tremendous potential, you just have to make sure he's taking his meds! When scouting football players you sometimes here the term "north/south." Like this guy runs fast north and south. Well...this refers to Underwood as well, unfortunately for you north/south = bi-polar.

7) Rob Lunn
FWG: A slow (fat) white guy with minimal talent, who caught every lucky break on his way to a career that will best be remembered for an internet blog than any on the field prowess. Oh and leadership, he was a good leader.

FP: This is what we call a "reach pick," because you're definately reaching here. I mean, were you worried somebody was going to draft you in round 8? I fully expected this tho...and I had plans to take you with my 11th pick. "Mr. Irrlevent" long snapper.

9 Jamal Reynolds
"The greatest defense end the world has ever seen, period" Well, not quite. The former first rounder did a short stint with Green Bay and then bounced around a bit before ultimately joining me in the unemployment line. So why draft him? 'Cause I like to think he still wants to make good on that statement. Call me an optimist. Or even paralyzingly sarcastic, but Jamal Reynolds deserves another shot---no major arrests or character issues unlike most of my draft picks, hes a lock at defensive end.

FP: He's right, I've never seen him, nor heard of him. And if he hasn't been arrested or beat up a hooker or something...then I have no material for him. He's useless to me.

10 Bob Sapp-
If his illustrious MMA Career or namesake has taught us anything, it is that more black men in the middle is a good thing. Currently unaffiliated, I'm taking Sapp in draft. Bonus points for his role in The Longest Yard, references to which, up until now I've painstakingly avoided. Guilty.

FP: If your gonna take someone from TLY, why not Romanowski? He had his own pharmacy, and broke the jaws of both opponents and teammates. I'm not sure Sapp has done that in the MMA.

11) Bryce Popp(Pop/Paup)

Who? Exactly. Try and Google him. Nothing. I'm really throwing this out there, someone (anyone) send me a link to information about Bryce (Brice?) Pop (Popp/Paup?). I remember the sports talk shows of Western New York (Yes, both of them) hailing him as a defensive savior for the Bills. Then...nothing. Even in the age of the internet He cannot be found. Not to sound arrogant, but that is the definition of obscure...even I'm on there. So, Yes. I choose you Bryce Popp, like my secret Pokemon.

FP: Well, the first thing I did was google myself, cuz I like to do that. How can you be a Bills fan and not know Bryce Paup. He had 17.5 sacks in 95' to go along with 89 tackles...impressive. 4 straight Pro Bowls from 94-97. He works for the Packers and coaches high school football in Green Bay.

Coach: Bob Knight
A man that knows nothing about football for a league that probably doesn't know much either. Recipe for success. No one loves winning, or knows how to win like Knight. And the seeming lack of organization or accountability in the UFL should really test his patience; now that's something fans can rally behind.

FP: 3 yards and a cloud of dust...the cloud of dust being the old bastard that is your coach. He's gonna ride your ass like Juan Valdez. "Lunn, if you'd spend as much time on the field as you do in front of a g damn computer you might become a football player. And tell LT to to wipe up and get out here. F'in panzies."

Part II Drops Tomorrow