Fatpickle's note: Please welcome Porkboy46 as a regular contributor to Fatpickled. Porkboy comes to us with an awesome resume. He has logged thousands of hours in front of a TV forming his opinions on athletes and sports. His writing experience consists of emails and letters to Donovan Mcnabb, Terrell Owens, and Andre Rison.. and that's pretty much his literary background. His brain has turned to shit, and this is the kind of shit he's going to share with you. Welcome aboard! I read a small piece in SI and it talked about the decision by the Cardinals to go back to Edgerrin James for more carries because they wanted to be more balanced on offense. The big reason was negative carries. They experienced 3 times more negative carries when Hightower was the starter. Negative carries are runs that loose yardage, giving you 2nd and 12, and 2nd and 13 situations. Those are never good, but even worse in the playoffs. The situation reminded me of when that pissbag quarterback Scott Mitchell left Detroit and went to Baltimore. He was asked if it would be tough not having Barry Sanders? His reply was "yeah it will be nice not to have all those 2nd and 13 situations." You can't consistently put your offense in 2nd and long and 3rd and long. The back that grinds out a 1 yard or 2 yard gain is keeping his teams options open for the rest of the series. They say that a sack is worth about 3 points because it almost always is a drive stopper. By that logic a running back who constantly dances looking for the home run might be costing his team a point every time he doesn't trust the hole and get whatever he can get. I have been so impressed with the Cardinals and their whole team make over that they have had in the playoffs!.....Larry Fitzgerald is the truth !
How about Mc-rib (Mcnabb ) giving that look when he got the safety?.... Is this another rule you don't know about you tool? I did like the phone deal he did on the sideline late in the game, I like it because it again showed what an idiot he is. What was with Tennessee D-end and those red contacts? Did he think it was going to help him see a fastball better?... All it let him see is his team doing its best impersonation of the Cowboys, lots of penalties and lots of turnovers! Lendale White has got a gut bigger than mine!! CBS does a mediocre job when they roll out their A team, so a Saturday with their B team really sucked! It was like they had only 2 cameras and hardly any replays. It looked like Flacco stepped out of the endzone and no one noticed it or even replayed it? I was going f'ing nuts! It wasn't until Sunday morning that ESPN showed that he came close but did not go out of the back of the end zone. They said " he almost pulled an Orlovsky!"
I look forward to seeing the Cards host a conference title game... and rooting against the Eagles! That will be sweet!!
Please post some comments about our articles, we are going to have a random drawing for the people that comment. 1 lucky person will get an autographed picture of me with no shirt on !!!
So by now you have read a thousand articles about how the BCS sucks and college football needs a playoff system, well here's # 1,001. But first, let me ask this question...have you read an article saying the BCS is awesome and there is no need for a playoff? I'm sure the answer to that is no. So if you and I and every other sane person knows we need a playoff, why isn't it done?
We all know it comes down to money. The universities, the coaches, the host cities, and the networks are getting rich and none of them wants to give up the $$$$. Meanwhile, the student athletes are often deprived of playing for the one thing that means something to them, a National Title. So while Bob Stoops will walk away with a 6 figure bonus for having his team lose a fictional title game, all the players from Utah got was some D-list swag. Oh yeah, the Utah (Texas, USC) players also have a lifetime of asking themselves what could have been?
The college season started in August and finished in January, parts of six months. Yet we still don't have a clear cut national champion. Every other college sport has a playoff system. Both Men's and Women's Basketball, Lacrosse, Volleyball, Baseball/Softball, everything. And not just Division I, Divisions II and III have playoffs.
Obama will have his hands full trying to fix the economy and world peace, but this is a simple fix. He's already got his plan and like Chris Berman says here, "you can probably make that happen."
"Norv Turner ain't worth a shit, Russ Grimm should be the head coach of the Skins"
Margaret Pearson circa 1995
My late Grandmother told me those words with great confidence. And while she may have been right that Grimm was the best coach the Skins had in 1995 (or 2008), Russ has never risen to the head coach position. In fact, this time of year that normally was the annual "Art Monk gets the shaft for the HOF" time of year, is now the Russ Grimm "gets the shaft for the HOF and head coaching position" time of year. This will mark the 5th consecutive season that Grimm has been interviewed for head coaching positions, and the 4th consecutive season that he has been a finalist for the HOF.
As a player Russ won 3 Super Bowls in his 11 seasons with the Skins. He was elected to the Pro Bowl 4 times, and also was selected All Pro 4 seasons. He played Center, Guard, and Tackle. He was the definition of the "Hogs." As a coach he has led some of the best offensive lines in the past 15 years. He also added another Super Bowl ring as a coach for the Steelers. He can boast on his resume that he has played or coached 19 seasons under Bill Cowher and Joe Gibbs.
So while Grimm may not be a great interview, or some new offensive genius, he is the epitome of a coach. Just look at the picture above, is that not the picture you would put in the dictionary under football coach?
So I hope that this is the year that Grimm gets his parlay, a HOF ticket and to be the head coach of a NFL franchise. My guess, Russ gets into the Hall of Fame, and passed over again as a coach.
But I hope I'm wrong, and I hope an owner will step up to prove my Nanny right!
I've played and watched a lot of basketball in my time, but this week was the first time I heard the term "crab dribble." I'm familiar with the "crab walk", an old school exercise from football practice back in the day. When researching for this post, I learned the urban dictionary meaning for "crabwalk."(Warning, adult humor)
Basketball wasn't my sport, although I was an awesome shooter. However, I didn't enjoy passing the ball or playing defense, sounds like I could have made the NBA!
I do know what a travel is, and I love Lebron James being called for one in the final seconds of a tight game. The Wizards may be terrible this season, but their rivalry with the Cavs is worth watching.
(I've watched this several times, he may take 4 steps?)
Now, my picks for today. I must confess that this has been my worst season by far, for picking NFL games. I was 0-2 yesterday, so I need to get these 2 right, just to get to .500.
Baltimore 20 Miami 17
Defense wins Championships. The Ravens aren't going to win the Super Bowl, but they win here.
Eagles 27 Vikings 13
Tarvaris Jackson has played well since returning from injury. I expect Jim Johnson to blitz him early and often, and Jackson to play poorly today.
Another season is in the books for the Washington Redskins. It was a season of highs and lows and it seemed to fly by especially fast this year. In the end they finished where they started, a very "medium" 8-8. Some would say that with a new coach an 8-8 or 9-7 season was to be expected, I would disagree. This was a playoff team in 2007 and nearly every piece of the puzzle, both coaches and players alike, were back. That coupled with a 6-2 first half should have meant a playoff birth. Oh well, there's always next year. Here's my final grades for the Skins, from the top to the bottom.
Dan Snyder - B- Good things, He didn't have his private jet flying all over the place spending big $$ on free agents last offseason. He didn't keep Gregg Williams around to be the head coach, and was able to keep Greg Blache from retiring. Honoring Sean Taylor with induction to the ring of honor was a nice touch. He also provided some enjoyable YouTubes. Now for the bad, His loyalty to Vinny Cerrato has not provided the Redskins with the front office structure they need to be successful (ie Vinny needs to go.) The Zorn pick for Head Coach is still debatable, especially if Jim Swartz is a successful head coach next year. Cowboys, Eagles, and Steeler fans taking over Fedex was embarrassing, the marketing department should have been proactive in not allowing this to happen
Vinny Cerrato - D
The draft was a debacle, aside from Horton and Brennan, nice pickups late in the draft. DeAngelo Hall was a nice addition mid-season, but then everyone knew he would land in Washington. Everything else sucked. Jason Taylor was a huge bust. Cerrato's choice of a Punter actually cost us a game or two! Lets see what Vinny has in store for us this offseason.
Jim Zorn (Head Coach) - C
At this point I like Zorn better as a head coach than an offensive coordinator. He seemed to run a tight ship and appeared well prepared from the start of training camp. Too much info given to the media about in house stuff. His public spat with Portis was not handled well. The Skins were 2-6 in the 2nd half. Hail maroon and black.
Jim Zorn (Offensive Coordinator) - C-
The offense had a few moments where things were clicking but not many. The rushing game was strong (using the same plays from Gibbs.) Play calling was poor and Zorn sometimes appeared lost. Red zone offense was terrible. Offense ranked near the bottom of the league in scoring and yards. Zorn needs to get much better or delegate more.
Greg Blache - B
He led the 4th ranked defense in the NFL. Got the defense to play well thru injuries. Coming back next year, but several coaches may not. Only gripe is the defense didn't seem to make stops or big plays when needed.
Quarterbacks - C
Campbell only turned the ball over 7 times and improved his QB rating and completion percentage for 3rd straight year. But, the improvements are baby steps, not giant strides. QB's with less experience are playing better and leading their teams to the playoffs. It's time so start seeing improvements in the W department. Collins took only a handful of snaps. Colt Brennan is like the new chick in school. Everyone wants to date her because they think she's hot. The truth is, she may not be hot, she's just new. However, Colt should get extra snaps and game time in preseason next year to see what he can do.
Running Backs - B
Portis had a Pro Bowl season, was 4th in the league in rushing and played thru various injuries. He did say several negative things publicly about his coaches and teammates in the media, and for the first time I have concerns about his character. Betts was serviceable as his backup and Cartwright played little. Sellers had a Pro Bowl season was a beast as a blocker. If we could just take back one play.
Wide Receivers - C-
Moss had a 1000 yd season and is still a game changer. However, he dropped to many balls and seemed to disappear from the offense for several weeks at a time. Randle El would have good numbers for a 3rd WR, which he should be, but he's our 2nd. Thrash contributed little. Thomas showed glimpses of promise but overall did not do much. Kelly is a disaster to this point.
Tight Ends- B
Cooley posted career highs in receptions and yards on his way to his 2nd consecutive Pro Bowl selection. Zorn needs to use him more down field (deep post, post corners) and in the red zone. Yoder played well when called upon. Boozie Davis came thru with a -3 yd reverse.
Offensive Line - C-
Strong running game averaged 130 yds per game, 8th in the NFL. Kendall probably stood out along with Samuels (when healthy.) Pass protection was poor and the line is getting old. This unit has to be a priority in the offseason.
Defensive Line - C
Played well against the run. This line is made up of serviceable NFL players, no studs. Golston, Montgomery, Alexander, Griffin, and Evans are all good players. Carter and Taylor provided little pressure on the QB, and combined for only 66 tackles and 7.5 sacks. We need a difference maker on this unit.
Linebackers - B-
Fletcher was awesome and is the heart of the defense, he was robbed of the Pro Bowl. Mcintosh played well. I'm worried that Marcus Washington will never be the same again. HB Blades played decent filling in both inside and outside spots. If Jason Taylor comes back, I would like to see him moved around more and used like he was in the Eagles game.
Secondary - B Springs was banged up again and will be gone next year. Rodgers played better, but still can't catch. I hope he catches a 1,000 passes a day in the offseason. Smoot is a solid #3 CB. Hall played decent, but he tackles like my 4 year old. I think we need to resign him, but don't get crazy doing so. Landry is tough, but needs to cut out the stupid penalties. Horton showed flashes and could become a solid player.
Special Teams - D Yuck. The Punters were terrible. Randle El was horrible returning punts. Suisham was ok early, but got cold at the worst time of the year. Coverage teams were so-so. Cartwright does a fine job returning kicks.
I guess if you average these grades together you'd come out with a C average. A medium grade indeed. Certainly better than I fared in High School and College, but not what I'd have hoped for from my team. Like I said earlier, there's always next year see you in Miami!
I read a small piece in SI and it talked about the decision by the Cardinals to go back to Edgerrin James for more carries because they wanted to be more balanced on offense. The big reason was negative carries. They experienced 3 times more negative carries when Hightower was the starter. Negative carries are runs that loose yardage, giving you 2nd and 12, and 2nd and 13 situations. Those are never good, but even worse in the playoffs. The situation reminded me of when that pissbag quarterback Scott Mitchell left Detroit and went to Baltimore. He was asked if it would be tough not having Barry Sanders? His reply was "yeah it will be nice not to have all those 2nd and 13 situations." You can't consistently put your offense in 2nd and long and 3rd and long. The back that grinds out a 1 yard or 2 yard gain is keeping his teams options open for the rest of the series. They say that a sack is worth about 3 points because it almost always is a drive stopper. By that logic a running back who constantly dances looking for the home run might be costing his team a point every time he doesn't trust the hole and get whatever he can get. I have been so impressed with the Cardinals and their whole team make over that they have had in the playoffs!.....Larry Fitzgerald is the truth ! 
How about Mc-rib (Mcnabb ) giving that look when he got the safety?.... Is this another rule you don't know about you tool? I did like the phone deal he did on the sideline late in the game, I like it because it again showed what an idiot he is.
What was with Tennessee D-end and those red contacts? Did he think it was going to help him see a fastball better?... All it let him see is his team doing its best impersonation of the Cowboys, lots of penalties and lots of turnovers! Lendale White has got a gut bigger than mine!!
CBS does a mediocre job when they roll out their A team, so a Saturday with their B team really sucked! It was like they had only 2 cameras and hardly any replays. It looked like Flacco stepped out of the endzone and no one noticed it or even replayed it? I was going f'ing nuts! It wasn't until Sunday morning that ESPN showed that he came close but did not go out of the back of the end zone. They said " he almost pulled an Orlovsky!"
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